Settling in

Well I am settling in to MY new home. That's right I moved out of my mothers house!! Yay me!! : ) J and I are getting back into our routine and I could not be more excited!! We have been her just over a week and other than the first night J was here ( he was with his daddy the weekend I moved in ) we haven't had any problems. I still have a few things I need to purchase to complete our new home but they will come in time.
We are getting ready for Christmas which is always exciting! I can't wait to exchange gifts with each person we have bought for! I still have shopping to do but I'm going to finish it this weekend then all next week I wrap! : ) at first I wasn't going to wrap Santa stuff but I think I will. I'll wrap in different paper but I think it will be more fun for J to unwrap EVERYTHING
I'm still struggling with the holidays thing the fact that my boy will not be with me all day. He will never get to open his stuff and play with it because he will always have to leave to go with his dad. : ( J has been struggling with missing his dad a lot here lately. I am at the point that I don't know what else to say. I've reassured him his daddy loves him and misses him. That anytime he wants to call him all he has to do is ask. We've talked about me missing him too but nothing is helping and it's not getting better or easier. I think that part of his issue is I'm still not comfortable with it. I want to date I want to find someone but I'm afraid that I'll find someone who doesn't understand J is number 1 in my life period or someone J doesn't like. I know I'm totally over thinking it but it's a very scary thing. I just hope that in time I get over that fear.
Any other single moms have this fear?? Please tell me I'm not alone!!

Love always
A

Road trip

Currently we are headed west to see my middle sister H at school. This is my first trip over to see her college town I'm excited to see her but not starting this trip till 10:00 PM and it's a 5 hour drive... Yeah it's going to be a long trip.
I was recently reminded that I've been an official single girl for one whole month... A lot has happened and changed in this month. First and foremost I'm no longer "in love" with my ex husband. Part of this hurts my heart but a bigger part is ready to move forward. Recently things have happened that I have realized there is life after divorce. I'm now able to stand on my own 2 feet financially meaning J and I no longer have to live at my moms house. I'm proud to say after the first of the month we will living on our own home!!! : ) I'm very very excited!! I can't wait to start my new life with my love!
I'm going to leave you with that smiling face! Love him!!

It's been a while

I want to get back to blogging hopefully daily but if not at least every other day!

Single life hasn't been to hard on me except I'm currently living with my mother! That's a whole post in its self!! For now I'll just say J and I have survived this much and my new book has only just begun! : )

Love Always: Ash

Our Weekend

This weekend was eventful to say the least.

Friday we had t-ball practice then his Grammy and Pop-Pop came over to visit for a little while.

Saturday morning I got up and mowed the front yard which is a first for me at this house. I am sure the neighbors were laughing at me but hey a girls gotta get things done! After that J and I got cleaned up and headed to town. I had a few errands to run before we headed to see my dad and step mom.

This is my niece M1 we celebrated her 5th birthday with the whole family Saturday night but before we did that

Me and these two ladies... I just realized you can't see KJ.... went to get my tattoo!!

 I have issues with needles so I closed my eyes!

 The top of the heart hurt the worst!

This isn't a great picture of it and my arm is all blotchy but those are J's initals and the heart is bright pink which is my favorite color... some would tell you it's my signiture color : )

I have wanted tattoo for a long time I just didn't know what I wanted once I decided what I wanted and where I wanted it I couldn't wait to have it done. It turned out better than I had it pictured. I love it. The special thing about it is the font is called Jackson which is J's first name!

After we were done with that we headed back to dad's to hang out with the family

I love hanging out with family it always turns into a good time!!

Sunday J and I got up and mowed the backyard which was way harder than the front because of the trampoline and the swingset! But I managed to get it all done..... well except the weed eating I can't weed eat to save my life! Lucky for me my Uncle S got his nephew to come over after school today and weed eat for me!

I have told myself I don't need a man to take care of me I can do it all myself and I can except run a weed eater... Oh well : )

J went with his dad for a few hours so I decided to head over and talk to a friend about Scentsy which I have started selling if anyone is interested in it. Then I went out to the farm and hung out until it was time to meet the realtor to put our house on the market.

All and all it was a great weekend I can't wait to see what happens next weekend!!

Big Changes are a comin......

Over the last couple of days I have had to make several big choices for J and I.

The first being that I can no longer live in the house I am currently renting. I could stay here but J and I would have no money for the fun stuff. I love this house and the neighborhood. It has a great yard I can't say enough about it. I have an amazing friends who have offered their Mother in Law suite for J and I to rent. It's 2 bedroom 1 bath which is perfect for us!! We will share the kitchen with them which is totally fine. We have agreed that we are going to take turns making dinner for what is going to be an extended family! They have a daughter K that is a little over a year younger than J and they get along great so hopefully this works out for a while for us. I know that I can't live there forever but at least until school gets out and the summer is over. Once school starts I hopefully can find my own place hopefully here.. If not I have the option to move where my dad and step mom live which isn't far from which wouldn't be bad.

The second is that I finally putting our Garfield house on the market. Thank goodness!! That house has been nothing but a burden since we purchased it. Right now we are renting it and I have learned I am not cut out to be a landlord!

I am finally coming to realize C is never coming home to stay, I will never again hear him pull into the driveway after work. I will never smell his smell in the my house again. All these things still make me very sad. But one day at a time I am getting a little stronger I am a little less sad. I am not quite ready to move on but I am ready to start a new chapter in my life.

This song is totally my theme song right now..



My Ring

Almost 7 years ago C put a sparkly diamond ring on my hand and we said I DO... Today I am taking it off for the final time. My question is what do I do with it?? Do I keep it to give to Jackson?? Do I sell it?? I love my ring and it holds great memories I searched a long time to find it. I'm just at a loss as to where it goes from here....

Day 1

I never imagined that near 7 years ago I would be here. But I am sure that anyone who gets married thinks they will end up separated and taking care of the child or children alone. I myself only have 1. An amazing 6 year old boy we will call J. This blog is going to have fun times about not so fun times along my journey as a single mom.

Today's adventure..... J clogged the toilet up!! Now I have had to use a plunger before I thought oh this is NO big deal..... That was until the water started to OVERFLOW! I freaked out!! Who knew one little boy could stink up a whole house! But no need to fear Super Mom got the whole situation under control and cleaned up!!

Now most post will include pictures but today I figured it was better left unphotographed!!